Haunting a Circus

Since time immemorial, October has been a time when I try (and fail) to scare myself by taking a date to a haunted house.  The date is important, because when I fail to get scared, I can still be amused by the funny things my date does when she's frightened.

When I got married, that tradition had to end.  Robyn is too terrified of haunted houses.  She did attempt to go with me once, but she nearly passed out from fear and it has been clear since then that she will never be my date for a haunted house.  Back in 2011, I came up with the brilliant idea to ask my little sister on a haunted date.  Since then, it has been an annual event, and it has been fantastic.

This year we returned to the place where it all began.  We took our haunted date to the Haunted Circus, where we had it in 2011.  This year it was a double date.  Zack and Dann came along with us, so I informed them that they were on a date.  There was a bit of a debate about which one was the woman, and the jury is still out on that.

Here is some of the preciousness that ensued while we were trying to frighten ourselves.

Is it possible to go on a date without taking a selfie?

This animatronic clown was kind enough to pose with us.

The four of us posing in the front.  We told those girls they could photobomb us if they wanted.  Who wouldn't want to be in a picture with us?

We even got a picture where there was actually light.  

I would say this year's haunted date was a success.  The highlights were when Zack was frightened by Gorliath, when Dann said really awkward things to the guy who wouldn't let him through and I realized that that level of awkwardness was more frightening than any other horrors they could put in front of me, and  of course when we asked the moss creature if we could have a hug and he hugged each of us.

Where will we haunt next year?

A Week of Bachelorhood

Last week, I was without a wife for the entire week.

Robyn's family had been in town the previous week, and so Robyn took the opportunity to ride back with her Dad to California so that she could visit friends and family back there, and most importantly to spend some quality time with her aging grandmother.

I didn't really have any plans to do anything while she was gone.  I mostly figured I'd read a whole bunch of books.  (That's what I do when she's home, so I figured I'd do it even more when she's gone.)

Naturally, I read an issue of Astounding Science Fiction from 1938.  It nearly disintegrated in my hands.

In addition to reading, it turned out there were lots of people willing to spend quality time with me, and keep me busy.

So here are a few of the things I spent time doing.

I went on a super sweet hike to Stewart Falls with Jen and Todd.

Look how precious we were

It was a super fun hike.  I've done that hike at least 3 or 4 times before, but it's the first time I've done it since losing lots of weight.  It turns out it's a way easier hike than I remember.  (I should have worn a 70 pound backpack to simulate what it would be like to hike it back then.) Here are a few bonus pictures from the hike:

I loved the thick vegetation.  It almost felt like we were in Hawaii or somewhere not Utah.

I told Jen and Todd to look precious.

This spider was weird.  It looked like a black widow but it was white.  I shall give it the highly scientific name of white widow.

This butterfly was just taking a sip from the flowers.

The trees provided a nice window to get a first glimpse of the falls.

It's important to take a selfie at the falls.

What up Stewart Falls!

It turns out I like hiking, so I take lots of pictures.  Who would have thought?

On a different night, I had a very special man date.  Matt and I saw The Edge of Tomorrow.  I really liked it.  It turns out our last man date was to see Oblivion.  We just like to see Tom Cruise Sci-fi movies together.

Look how precious we were in the theater.

I spent a whole afternoon organizing my books.  They're almost 90% organized now.  All authors are together within themselves and there are even genres together.  It's amazing.

I even got to see my little Bro and my future nephew.  Don't they totally look alike?

Of course, the most time consuming thing all week was that my Mom put me to work on several different nights scanning pictures of my grandparents.  It was actually really cool.  It was a lot of work, though, because most of them were glued into albums and so I had to scan whole pages and then use Photoshop to separate them into multiple images.  I'm still not actually finished with that task.  But, I did already write about my favorite pictures here.

I'd say it was a successful week of bachelorhood, but I'm glad to have my wife back.  Being married is way better.

Dinosaurs and Chocolate

Throughout history, there have been 2 things that all civilizations have agreed are pretty much the best things ever.   Those two things are dinosaurs and chocolate.  Science has been unclear on which of the two is actually more awesome.  (Other than, OBVIOUSLY DINOSAURS!  I mean, they're giant lizards, for crying out loud!)

Truthfully, the best things ever would clearly be dinosaurs and bacon.  But if I said that, it wouldn't be a very good segway into the story I'm about to tell you where I went to a museum that had exhibits about dinosaurs and chocolate, so just bear with me on this one, okee dokee?  It did include me eating chocolate covered bacon, so there's no denying it was the best day ever.

Robyn and I went to the Natural History Museum of Utah on Saturday with my brother and his wife.  We all know that natural history includes a number of branches of history.  But my brain automatically translates the words "natural history museum" into "dinosaur museum".  So clearly I was there for the dinosaurs.  But there is a temporary exhibit about chocolate as well.

First, let's talk dinosaurs.

I've been a dinosaur nerd since I was like 3 years old.  The only reason I even consented to attend Kindergarten was because my mom said that if I went to school I would be able to read the dinosaur book by myself.  (Side note: I was very angry at the end of my first day when they didn't even try to teach me how to read the dinosaur book.  But the good news is that I have read many dinosaur books since then.)

Despite my nerdiness about dinosaurs, it turns out there was an awesome dinosaur that was native to Utah that I didn't even know about.  How embarrassing is that?

Let me introduce you to diabloceratops.

Diabloceratops was the cool kid of the ceratops community.  What he lacked in a third horn on his face, he made up for with two extra horns coming out of the top of his bony frill.

Diabloceratops was super popular with the ladies.  He was captain of the football team and most importantly, he was native to Utah.  (Note: the part about being native to Utah is true.  The rest of this paragraph is purely speculative.)

This is what diabloceratops looked like when he was getting ready to build a nest in my backyard.

You know diabloceratops was cool, because of his name.  Think about it.  Triceratops got his name because he has 3 horns.  Big deal.  Diabloceratops was so tough and intimidating, they named him after the devil.

Plus, he was pretty cool because he agreed to pose for this picture with me.

Diabloceratops and I were both disappointed that we were photobombed by other lesser ceratops individuals.

Diabloceratops may have been the biggest new thing I learned about in the prehistoric exhibit, but here are a few other snapshots of some fun experiences.

Zack and I were discussing how much of a deterrent the stegosaurus ridged back would be against predators.  Robyn snapped a pic of our nerdiness.

It turns out alligators have been around for 76 million years.  But they were even more ginormous back then.

Bears have been around a long time too.  But back then they walked around like zombies, and so did Zack and I.

In case you were wondering, tyrannosaurs had bigger feet than Robyn.  Do you think tyrannosaurs liked shoes as much as she does?

After seeing the dinosaur exhibit, we did learn some other things about Utah history.  But it clearly wasn't as awesome as learning about dinosaurs.  So I only have one picture to share with you in that section.

Zack and I are pottery masters

They had different pots that were all broken up.  It was supposed to simulate what you would find if you dug them up.  You got to put them back together like a puzzle.  The guy before us wasn't able to figure it out, but we dominated it because that's how we roll.

The last exhibit was the chocolate exhibit.  There were two parts.  There was the exhibit itself, which gave some history about chocolate.   Then they had also invited local chocolate makers to set up booths and give out samples of their chocolate.  I can't remember who gave me chocolate covered bacon, but it was surprisingly delicious.  The other best thing was fudge from The Chocolate Covered Wagon.  (You probably don't care, but I'm writing it down so that I can come back and remember where I need to buy that fudge when my heart begins to yearn for it.)

Without further ado, let's talk about the chocolate exhibit.

The most important thing I learned was that the Mayans were the first people to ruin chocolate.  That's not quite how the exhibit worded it, but it's the truth.  They made a spicy chocolate drink by mixing the cacao beans with chili peppers.  Isn't that an abomination?  Can you believe that people were concerned a few years ago that the Mayan calendar ending must mean the end of the world?  These people couldn't even make hot chocolate properly and we're concerned that they knew when the world would end?

We got to see what a chocolate tree looks like.  Look at those ginormous cacao pods.

Zack was very precious with this European lady.  Europeans were the first to figure out how to make chocolate taste good by mixing it with sugar.  I'd like to say that's why Zack was so enamored with her, but I think he was just trying to be funny because he was bored with the history of chocolate.

This was my favorite part of the chocolate exhibit.  It didn't have anything historical to teach us, but it made me imagine how awesome it would be if we could get a giant box of chocolates.  Are you with me?

Ghosts Love Bacon

Warning:  This post is kind of long.  Also, it involves strange paranormal things that might make you think I'm crazy.  But don't worry.  If you read far enough, there will be bacon.

Friday night I was able to cross an important item off my bucket list.  I had the opportunity to go ghost hunting.

When I heard that there was an opportunity to do an expedition in Brigham City, naturally I asked my brother Zack to come with me.

Robyn wasn't exactly excited about me going.   She heard the word 'ghost' and decided she should be scared.  She let me know that under no circumstances was I allowed to bring any ghosts home with me.  I told her I would do my best.  Of course, we all know how likable I am, so it does make sense that they would all want to follow me home to spend more time together.

We arrived at the Baron Woolen Mill in Brigham City, Utah.  It was built by the LDS Church in the late 1800s and was later purchased by the Baron family.  It continued to operate privately until 2002 when it was abandoned.

It has never looked as good as it did when I was in front of it.

We walked in where we met Tom, the owner of Wasatch Paranormal Investigators.

I had no idea what to expect.  I wasn't even sure if I believed in ghosts.  My religion teaches that there is life after death and that there are spirits of those who have passed on.  However, that doesn't mean I'm not skeptical about those who claim to have contact with the other side.

Zack voiced this skepticism (that he also shared) to Tom and asked him what we should do if we are skeptical but want to be believers.

"Just keep an open mind." was Tom's advice.

I consider myself pretty open minded.  I think that's something I can do.

The first hour was spent with Tom.  He gave us some history of the Baron Woolen Mill.  He told us the stories of the 4 known deaths that have happened here.  He explained to us what exactly it is that we would be doing.  Finally, a man named Fred, and his wife Tracy, arrived.  They were to be our guides as we toured the mill.  The 3 remaining hours were divided up between 3 parts of the mill.  One hour in each.

The first hour was in the main building of the mill.  This was the largest of the 3 areas and had the most to look at.  I commented to Fred that even without ghost hunting, it was worth the 15 dollar admission to get to explore the ruin of an abandoned mill.  I thought it was super cool.

This section was also where I took the most pictures.

The vent on the boiler

This is the room where they stored the coal for the furnace.

The furnace

They placed these flashlights here and asked the ghosts to turn them on.  They actually turned on and off.  The first time it happened it blew my mind.  I told Fred that and he was very excited.  By the end of the night, it was old news because it happened so many times.

This is the "Ghost Meter Pro".  It detects electromagnetic fields.  You ask the ghosts questions and they can flash the lights to answer.  We told them to do once for yes and twice for no.

This room was for processing the wool.  The big things would suck up the wool and do something magical with it.

Zack tried out the divining rods.  We weren't convinced that they did much.

That first area was super huge, so we spent a lot of time exploring and not tons of time "hunting".  However, we did familiarize ourselves with the equipment, which helped us on the rest of the hunt.  (I'm not gonna lie, the equipment made me feel a little bit like a ghost buster.)

The second area was a smaller building that had been used primarily for storing the wool and some of the equipment.  We wandered through a little bit and then they told us they were gonna do some stuff with candles and flashlights.  This was the area that made me come pretty close to being a believer.  (I'm too much of a skeptic to be an all the way believer, until I can verify that nothing I saw was faked.)

I know the above picture is terrible.  We were sitting in pitch black.  They lit 3 candles and placed a flashlight on the table.  This is my excellent iphone shot of the setup.

What happened next was impressive.  I'm not gonna lie.  They asked the ghost to blow out the middle candle.  A wind filled the room, but only the middle candle blew out.

Fred looked at me and asked, "How is your mind now?"

"Doubly blown."

I wish I had caught that on video.  But after that, I started taking video.  They asked the ghost to turn on the flashlight, and the light turned on.  I actually got several videos of that, like I said earlier, that quickly became old news.  My videos are kind of lame, though, because it was so dark.  You can just see points of light coming on and off.

We relit the candle and asked them to do it again.  The little ghost pro devices kept saying "no" whenever we asked them.  I guess ghosts get tired.

We then went to our final area.

This was an outdoor enclosure.  I actually don't even know what its purpose was during the mill days.  They setup this laser grid so that we could see any movement in the dark.  We all took turns walking through it because it looked really cool to see figures moving.

I should have turned off the flash for this picture, so you could see the laser points better.

We sat and talked for a bit.  This area supposedly has a little boy who was killed in the mill.  Our guides offered the little boy some licorice.  He said yes through the ghost meter.

I asked our guide, "What does he do with the licorice?"  She said she's not sure.  Perhaps they can still taste or smell food.  Then she said the best thing of the whole night:  "I can't imagine not having bacon in the next world."

Important life lesson:  Bacon is the best part of this life, it's probably the best part of the next.

As time went on, they said the little boy likes to run around.  They asked him to "run through the pretty lights for us".  This is where the last fragment of my sanity left me.  I saw a figure running back and forth through the lasers.  It wasn't a full bodied form.  I couldn't necessarily see the shape of a person, but there was definitely movement.  If there was any trace of my mind that hadn't already been blown to pieces, that finished the job.

Soon after that, there was a glowing light, almost like an orb, that I saw for about a half second.  One of the other ladies with us pointed it out.  The guides tried to debunk it.  They said that other tour groups were on the other side of the wall, and it was probably flashes from their cameras.

The problem was that we had seen camera flashes, and they were much higher on the wall than this light.  The whole group got up and walked down to the end to investigate.  I was sitting there by myself with the ghost pro device.  I asked, "Did you cause the light?"  The device said yes.

That was the last exciting thing that happened.  Soon our time was over, and it was time to make the long, late night drive home.

In the end, I can't explain all the things I saw.  Certainly there are ways to fake many of the things.  Some of them would be pretty elaborate for the 15 dollars I spent, but I can't prove it wasn't an elaborate show.

At this point, I don't know what I believe.  I definitely saw things that expanded my reality.  Is it possible I was completely duped?  Yes.   And if so, they put on a show that was worth much more than my 15 dollars.

The final verdict:  I'm doing this again.  For science.