Two Weeks with a GoPro

I have a new toy.  If you haven't figured out that I like gadgets, you probably better just keep that to yourself, because it should be very obvious, and if anyone finds out you'll be really embarrassed.

So now that we're on the same page about my love for gadgets I can tell you about my new toy.

So the deal is, I wanted a camera to take diving with me.  (Since I'm now scuba certified.)  I have a waterproof camera, but it only goes to 30 feet.  Clearly, I'm going to be diving deeper than that.

I did some research and found that there are some really super fancy schmancy dive cameras out there for gobs and gobs of money.  But I also found that I could get a GoPro for $300, and it can go as deep as 100 feet.  So there are nicer cameras that are better for diving, but none of them for as cheap as the GoPro.

So I made the purchase.  But it turns out that the GoPro has lots of super fun features in addition to being able to go deep underwater.  I haven't had a chance to take it diving yet, but I've made sure to try out some of the features.

I tried out the time lapse feature.  I wanted to get a sunset, but there were too many clouds.  It turned out the clouds were pretty cool too.

I bought the chest mount so that I could wear it.  It's an awesome fashion accessory.

Since I've become a biker, I decided to wear it out biking.  However, it turns out that at first I had the mount connected incorrectly so it was kind of pointed downward.  I thought it looked like it was pointed down, but at first  I thought maybe it was supposed to because the wide angle lense would compensate for it.  FYI, if it looks like it's taping your legs, then it is taping your legs.  I got excellent video like this with my first try:

"I hope it's not taking video of the ground.  It kind of seems like it is."

Good news: I tried the bike riding again and was able to wear it correctly.  Most of the video consists of me breathing really hard, but it is fun to look back and see exactly what I saw as a biker.

Of course, another important feature of the GoPro is that it has an iPhone app that allows you to see what the camera is seeing through your phone. This clearly means that my niece and nephew take awkward extreme closeups of noses and tongues.

The remote control app also works really well while wearing it.  I wore the chest mount and had my finger on the button on the phone.  Then I pushed it when Robyn started laughing.  I was able to capture this preciousness.

The moral of the story is, the GoPro is super fantastically cool.  You should get one.  I'll let you know how good it is for diving eventually, but until then I'll be geeking out about all the other features.

Getting Sick is Gross

Have you ever had a cold?  It's kind of like the flu, only you usually just have a stuffy nose and maybe a few sneezes.  Most of the time if you have a cold, you go about your normal business as if nothing is wrong.

But there's something wrong with our society, if we don't think that a cold is a big deal.  Because somehow we've forgotten an eternal truth.  GETTING A COLD IS REALLY GROSS!

I had a cold for a couple days last week.  It was terribly gross.

I want you to imagine if you always had a cold.  Imagine you were in a job interview.

Potential Employer:  I like your resume, and you've answered all my questions like some sort of a guru.  Is there anything else you'd like to share about yourself?

You with a cold:  I have mucus that periodically leaks out of my face.

Potential Employer: That's gross.

You with a cold:  You don't know the half of it.  Periodically, I take a deep breath and then I use all that hair to have an explosion IN MY FACE.  The soul purpose of this explosion is to launch gross stuff in the air.  This gross stuff consists only of face mucus if you're lucky.  If you're unlucky it will contain a contagion that will cause you to leak mucus from your face as well.  Some people call this a sneeze.  I call it the grossest thing you can imagine.

Potential Employer:  Please leave the premises and never return.

As you can see, the potential employer's response is the only logical one.  How are we okay with people around us leaking mucus FROM THEIR FACES?

I don't have any larger point to make.  It just occurred to me that this is really gross, and our society seems way too okay with it.  There's no call to action here.  I just feel better having voiced my concern about how gross we all are when we get colds.

P.S.  I usually like to attach a picture to all my posts.  This post has no picture.  There was no picture  I could possibly imagine that would be both relevant to this post and also would not cause me to vomit.

Spammers Want to Meet Me

Spammers are awesome.  Sometimes I read my junk mail just to see what kind of awesome things I'll receive.  I had to share this gem with you

Hello.  I would like to meet you. Do you mind? I really want to meet and get acquainted with an interesting the man with whom I want to form good and saturated relationship. Write me if you do not mind my Email interestingflower@gmail.com . We could you better learn about each other.I'll wait for your letter with impatience,have a nice day!

If there's one thing I know to be true, it's that I'm an interesting the man.  People often say that I'm the man, but they forget to mention that I'm an interesting the man.

I'm the second most interesting the man, right behind this guy.

I do like good relationships, but my wife can attest to the fact that I like my relationships unsaturated.    (Actually, she probably can't, since neither of us actually know what that means.)

I didn't write this individual back, they only said to write if I don't mind their email.  Unfortunately, I do mind.  So if you are an interesting the man, feel free to drop this individual a line.  Hopefully, you'll get a chance to you better learn about each other.  If you're lucky you might get to download a virus as well.

I'm Totally a Biker

Most of you are probably aware that exercise has become a much more important part of my life over the past year.  I spend the majority of my mornings on the treadmill before I go to work.

For the last little while, Robyn and I have been talking about what we could do to get some variety into our exercise routine.  We decided that a good strategy would be to become bikers.

We consulted a few friends on what kind of bikes we should get, and finally made our way to the bike shop.  Despite being armed with the information our friends had given us as well as what the internet had to say, we let the salesman at the bike shop know that we were newbs when it came to biking.  He thought that was hilarious.

Note to salesmen everywhere:  If you think I am funny, I will rightly assume that you are knowledgeable and wise.  I'll totally trust your judgement on anything you tell me from that point on.

We rode around the parking lot on a few different bikes.  While I was test driving the bikes, I made sure to look sophisticated and intelligent so that everyone would think that I was a knowledgeable biker looking for the perfect fit.  Mostly I was feeling to see which bike hurt my bum the least.

We each selected a bike and took them home to their new home in our basement.

Aren't they so cute?

We have too much junk in our garage, but eventually the garage will be their home when we clear space for it.

Naturally, I had to hop on my bike right away and give it a go.  Also, one of the first things I did while riding was take a selfie.

Fun fact: Taking a selfie while riding a bike is harder than it looks.  Therefore, achievement unlocked!

I rode around our neighborhood and quickly discovered a problem.  The fact that we live at the top of a hill makes the beginning of the ride super awesome, and the end of the ride super sad.  On my maiden voyage, I was only able to make it 90% of the way back to the top before I got off and walked.

I tried again this morning. This time I made it all the way to our driveway!  It was only my second try!  (Achievement unlocked!)  My legs were burning and I could barely stand, but I totally did it.  However, I did have to send this text to Robyn:

But don't worry.  I kept my promise this evening.  My new goal:  ride all the way to the top of the hill and still have strength to carry the bike downstairs.

One Sign I Work at an Awesome Company

I really like my job.

It's true.  I really do.  Today something happened that reminded me of that fact.

It all started out pretty innocently.  Thursday is the day we sometimes go out to lunch.  We did so today.  Lunch was delicious.  After lunch, we got back to the office.  One thing lead to another, and well....

This.

See, the thing is, the company where I work is some sort of a magnet for tumbleweed.  It doesn't really make sense to me, but it's been building up over the last few months.

This is a picture I took of the buildup a few days ago.

We noticed that Chris's car had one tumbleweed that had managed to sneak under the front bumper.  That's when the brilliant idea was presented that all the tumbleweed should be on Chris's car.

So the project commenced.

After a few trips ferrying weeds back and forth, 2 of the owners of the company came out to see what all the commotion was.  Naturally, they joined in the project.  It's good to know that the owners are willing to get down and dirty and work alongside the employees when something needs to get done.

A little after five o'clock, I came up to see if he needed any help freeing his car from its bonds.  But he was already completing a little project of his own.

Revenge is sweet.  Especially when my car is unscathed on the far left.

A closer view of the revenge masterpiece.

The moral of the story is, my work is way more fun than yours.  Also, it has more tumbleweed.

Edit:  I wrote this last night, thinking that I had avoided the revenge since my car was unscathed.  I came in to the office this morning to discover this:

My work is still more awesome than yours.  Also, my office has more tumbleweed than yours.  (Or, more accurately, the hallway outside my office has more tumbleweed, since that's where I put it until I decide to take it out.)

I Just Tagged You on Facebook

I have a problem.  Well, I have lots of problems, but I'm only going to talk about one today.

I think I'm annoying all my Facebook friends.  I have a compulsive need, and I just have to feed it.  The thing is, I really need your face to be tagged on Facebook.

This need has been with me a long time, basically since the inception of Facebook.

It started out relatively harmless.  When I posted pictures I would tag everyone in my pics.  It sometimes resulted in me friending really random people just because they showed up in the background of a picture I took and I really needed to tag them.  (Now you can tag people that aren't your friends but that hasn't always been the case.)

Then I started noticing other people would post photos and not tag anyone in them.  Can you believe this?  They would post pictures WITHOUT TAGGING ANYONE!?!?!?!

I know you're as outraged as me, but for the one person out there in cyberspace who doesn't understand how important this is, let me explain.  You see, I love data.  I love that Facebook has compiled all sorts of data on my friends.  I love that I can search things like, "Photos of my friends taken in Hawaii" and I can see awesome photos of people I know in the happiest place on Earth.  (Anyone who thinks the happiest place on Earth is Disneyland has clearly never been to Hawaii.)  Or maybe I want to see my family as they were growing up, and I search something like "Photos of my family before 1999".


The point is that there are lots of ways to view the data that Facebook has gathered, but the search is useless if faces aren't tagged.

My need to perfect the data has been with me a long time.  But, for a long time I was able to resist tagging other people's photos.  Then Facebook implemented a new feature.  Now it recognizes faces and directly asks me if I want to tag them.  It's one thing to not type your name in and tag your face, but to ignore a direct question is beyond my ability to resist.

So if you're one of those people that doesn't like yourself tagged, I'm sorry.  Mark Zuckerberg and I have formed an alliance and we are going to catalog who is in every picture.  I hope you're not too annoyed.  I hope we can still be friends.