Over the past couple months, every time one of those unanswerable questions has come to me, I wrote it down. Now I have gathered them all in one place so that the good people of the internet can answer them for me.
Here goes:
- Why are they called red grapes when they are clearly purple?
- How does a razor remember to only cut hair off my face and not cut off skin as well?
- What if Deja Vu meant that you lost a life and restarted at the last checkpoint?
- What if the hokey pokey really is what it's all about?
- Of all the utensils that could have been invented to eat rice with, how did two sticks win out?
- What is a zig-a-zig-ah and why do the spice girls want it so bad?
- If Jimmy cracked corn and no one cares, why does he keep doing it?
- When I look in the gym mirror at myself I think "that dude doesn't look happy." So why does the gym have mirrors?
- When they have those restrooms that only one person fits in, why do they have a mens and womens?
- "Love is a battlefield." What does that even mean?
- Why do hot dogs come in packs of 10 while the buns come in packs of 8?
- Why do we cook bacon but bake cookies?
- Why is it that the yoke of an egg is delicious when uncooked, but if the white is uncooked I gag?
- Why do olives taste gross but olive oil is awesome?
- Why does hair grow fastest on my neck when clearly neck beards are gross?
- Why do they call it cupcake wars if no one ever throws cupcakes?
- Why is it that every person in front of me universally thinks that 30 mph is a good speed for getting on the freeway?
So, dear citizens of the internet. I hope you can help me out by giving me some answers. In exchange for your help I will let you look upon this awesomeness:
 |
| I googled "questions that need answering" and he came up. The greatest question is: how did he get so awesome? |
