Thursday, November 17, 2011

The Foursquare Enforcer

I met the foursquare enforcer.  He's very real.  So you better not ever cheat on foursquare.

I know, most of you don't even know what foursquare is.  Now I'm going to have to explain it to you and simultaneously reveal my own high level of nerditude.

Foursquare is a mobile application where you can track where you are and share it with your friends.  It uses the GPS in your phone to see where you are, then you "check in" to nearby venues.  Your friends can see where you are checked in, you can comment and share pictures of the places.

When you check in to certain types of places you get special badges that appear on your profile letting people know that you have done such noteworthy things as gone bowling, eaten hot dogs, or checked in really late on a school night.  It's pretty high class stuff.  Also, the person who has checked in to a given location the most times in the past two months is deemed the mayor of that location.  Some businesses even give discounts for checking in or becoming the mayor of their establishment.

This is where the story gets somewhat embarrassing.  I wanted a certain badge on foursquare that you earn by checking in to an office a certain number of times.  Whoever added my work to foursquare did not categorize it as an office.  Therefore, I was checking in every day to a real estate office across the parking lot.

That's when the foursquare enforcer swooped in and commented on my checkin.
Wherever there are people checking in from several hundred yards away.  I'll be there!
He reprimanded me for my evil ways and exhorted me to never check in there again.  I explained to him the importance of me getting this badge and asked him why it was so important that I not check in.  This was his response:

Because other people who actually work here want the mayorship. If you want to cheat, just make up a new fake office.

I really wanted to mock him for feeling so strongly about a dumb phone application.  Every ounce of my soul really wanted to pour forth some mocking words.  But then I remembered that I was the one who was cheating in the dumb cell phone application.  All the mocking really should be directed at me.  I had to sheepishly tell him that I wouldn't check in there again and he was free to pursue the mayorship of his dreams.

I'll get you next time foursquare enforcer!  You haven't seen the last of me!
Thus ends the sad tale of how the foursquare cheater was defeated by the foursquare enforcer.  Isn't it funny how the foursquare cheater looks just like me except with more hair and an awkwardly photoshopped head? Totally crazy.


  1. I'm glad that you are having so much fun with your iphone. anything to keep from working at work. what location are you the mayor of?

  2. This is proof - when old people assume I must be super techie I can tell them I am not because I had never even heard of foursquare (except in gradeschool) before your post. I am a sad excuse for a techie.

  3. Jared, I have a few important mayorships such as: my church, my dentist, the Cemetery near my house (I go on walks through it), the Wendy's near my work, the Endeca building in Chicago where I went for training, and our rental property.

    glarcy, I feel you should join foursquare. Then we could battle over mayorships and other such awesomeness.

  4. Yup, you are a BIG nerd. Maybe I shouldn't join foursquare to preserve marital harmony.

  5. So who is currently the mayor of my house--you or Mellen?

  6. Ahhh you need to fix your own office's foursquare so you can be the mayor! I think you should totally be mayor.

  7. hahahaha... I'm not sure which is funnier: You or the foursquare enforcer...

  8. Hahaha. You were good to back down politely. And I like that you are the mayor of the local cemetery.


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