Outstanding Citizen 2014 of the United States of America

President Obama emailed me.  I'm cool like that.

Here's the email:

Jeff Stockett,

You have been nominated as an Outstanding Citizen 2014 of the United States of America.

This award recognizes your efforts as a blogger and book reviewer. We have personally gone through all of your posts and your reviews and have enjoyed them immensely.

We will be holding an awards ceremony and banquet at the White House which you are cordially invited to.

The event will take place on February 8th at 6:00pm. Please rsvp to this email as soon as possible to reserve your spot and ensure that you make this momentous event.

Please note that this is a free event and there will be no charge for you to attend. However in the spirit of our illustrious government you will have to pay for your travel to and from the White House, a $500 fee for entrance to the event and your meal per plate, and an extra $3000 fee is you want to be in the room when I, the best president ever, arrive. Photos and handshakes are extra.

We look forward to seeing you there.

Congratulations!
Your gracious president,

Barack Obama


Okay, I have a secret to tell you. I'm pretty sure that was not actually an email from Barack Obama.  One clue is that the sender was from srs.kundenserver.de and one google search shows that that particular domain is spam central, but more importantly, I know our President is really into himself, but I think he's able to mask it just a little better than this writer.  Also, he may not know how to pronounce the word "corps" but he can structure his sentences well enough to not say something like, "Outstanding Citizen 2014 of the United States of America" or to write an email as if he, an individual, were some sort of collective.  (Is this email from the Borg?)

The question I have for you is, why did I receive the weirdest spam ever?  They're not asking for me to send any information.  I don't understand the scam that they're trying to put together.  Do they think I'll reply and then send them all the money they talked about?

Well, whatever the scam is, I won't be replying to that email.  However, I would like to publicly accept the nomination.  I hope you'll vote for me.  (If this is something people vote for.)

Also, feel free to print out this flyer and distribute it to your friends.