How To Eat a Brownie Without Eating a Brownie

The following is not good advice.  My wife claims that this kind of thinking is how I originally got to be 300 pounds.  I think this kind of thinking leads you down the path that rocks.

Have you ever had that experience where your wife makes a bunch of delicious unhealthy food for a friend or family member?  You know that feeling where you really need to eat some?

I had that feeling.  Robyn had made some brownies.  She put most of them on a plate to be taken and consumed by people that were not me.  Probably these people also hadn't set a goal to lose one third of their body weight.  Ah well, touché.

After she was done plating the brownies, there was a pan that looked like this:

It should be noted, there are 4 brownies in that pan.  

When I was done with it, it looked like this:

As you can see, there are still 4 brownies in the pan.

 
If there were 4 brownies when I started, and 4 when I was done, that means I ate zero brownies, amIright?

If I ate zero brownies, at approximately 200 calories per brownie, I ate zero calories.

Voila!  That's how you eat a brownie without eating a brownie.  You can thank me later.

When I explained this logic to Robyn, she wasn't impressed.  She told me that's how I got to be 300 pounds.  She was wrong, the old me would have made the pan look like this:

Or, more accurately, the old me would have demanded that she make a second pan just for me.  I'm just sayin'.